Day 98, Day 99
Day 98
WOD
Christine
“Christine”
3 Rounds
500m Row
12 Deadlifts (Bodyweight)
21 Box Jumps (20 inches)
My results
15:08 with 115lbs for weight.
Day 99
WOD
Back Squats
3-3-3-3-3
3 Rounds
10 DB Hang Squat Thruster (40/25)
15 KB Swings (2/1.5)
My results: 130lbs max weight for reps, 6:16 for the METCON
So after a week of doing afternoon workouts I am back to morning workouts again. I must say however that although I enjoyed the afternoon, it feels nice to know that I am done for the rest of the day.
The workouts felt good and I am feeling confident going into the deployment that I am pretty strong. Running however is still a weakness for me. But what I want to talk about this morning for a moment is body image.
So I was at the pool on Saturday and felt pretty good about the fact that I can now wear a bikini without shame. I mean it’s taken a while to get to that point, and while my body does not look perfect by my standards, my husband thinks I look fantastic. (And no, he’s not the type of man to give false complements.) So anyways I was at the pool and this girl, who looked like Heidi Klum’s sister was complaining about how fat she has gotten. Make no matter that she looked like a size two and had a COMPLETELY flat tummy and a beautiful tan. I couldn’t tell if she was serious but she looked serious so I am going to assume for the moment that she was actually embarrassed by her weight. So much so that she would not take off her cover up and join her friends in the pool.
So then I got to thinking, if this girl thinks she is fat, then I must look like Shamu in a bikini. I mean, if you’ve seen me, you know that I have some junk in my trunk. While I am small, I would never be mistaken for a “skinny girl”. For five minutes at the pool, I started to panic. Maybe I should put on my cover up. Maybe I should not be wearing a bikini after all. Maybe I should ditch the pool and lock myself in my condo and watch nothing but Biggest Loser re-runs to keep me terrified from missing a day at the gym.
Then after the panic attack I looked at skinny chick over there again. Here was this gorgeous woman complaining about how fat she looked. And I came to the conclusion that she was delusional or fishing for complements. What I learned from her is that when you only look to the outside to look good, you will never be happy. I have derived a lot of physical confidence from Crossfit that deals with more than just how I look. Sure, I am digging the Michelle Obama arms that I now have and I am stoked that I look so much better in my clothes. But I guess I am also just more mentally confident with my body because I know that I can workout hard and not give up. I am healthy and strong and in the best shape of my life. And that’s what’s really important in the long run. So maybe I don’t have rock hard abs yet and my butt is still a little bigger than I would like it to be. That butt allows me to squat 130lbs easy. It’ll get smaller and I am working on it. But in the meantime, I’m gonna be happy with how I look today and enjoy myself at the pool. In a bikini.
Amen!